Author Topic: King of Idiots  (Read 5631 times)

Offline goodguy

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Re: King of Idiots
« Reply #15 on: July 08, 2008, 11:01:49 PM »
"Dying like pancakes" is still my favorite one.  :laugh:
Matthias

Touti

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Re: King of Idiots
« Reply #16 on: July 08, 2008, 11:11:03 PM »
A few years ago my brother got a support call from someone who needed help because his coffee cup was stuck in the computer's "cup holder".

It took him at least 20 minutes of questioning and trying to get them to describe the problem in detail to finally realize they had no idea what a cd-rom drive was and had been using it as a place to put their coffee cups.

Apparently if fitted perfectly in the whole in the middle of the opened tray.

Najemikon

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Re: King of Idiots
« Reply #17 on: July 08, 2008, 11:31:32 PM »
I've heard that a lot! But if you want to get into support calls... :training:

User rings tech support. PC won't turn on. Support try all the usual things, checking cable connections, etc. Finally decide it is dead, and nothing can be done. They ask user for the serial number, which is of course on the back. The user says he can't see the back properly, because it is too dark without the light on. "Why can't you put the light on?", they ask. "Because there is a power cut..." comes the reply!!!

I had a customer bring a small laser printer in for repair. All the pages are dirty when printing. Not only that, sometimes you can read things in the marks! I suggest the logic board is shot and it's corrupting the image. They insist not because it prints things, they didn't ask for. The Twilight Zone theme goes through my mind as I start to dismantle the unit to check the drum. First things first, remove the paper tray... which I found was full of paper already printed on, possibly from a fax machine.  :hysterical:

Then there was the customer who rang us and had a fit about the diabolical service. How we promise to respond within four hours, but she emailed us days earlier and got no answer! I get her to calm down, apologise for the obvious, but unusual breakdown in our system, and would she mind please explaining the problem and I promise to make it a priority. How her email got lost, we don't know, but lets move forward. What is the problem? Her email hasn't been working. ??? That's right... her email wasn't working. So she emailed us to ask for help. She did quickly realise her mistake and did apologise. Personally, I'd have ran away... ::)




Touti

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Re: King of Idiots
« Reply #18 on: July 08, 2008, 11:45:40 PM »
Ok, let's keep on with support calls then.

Dring ! Dring !

Pick up the phone
Me: Yep !
User: My report isn't printing.
Me: Are you getting a message ?
User: No but it doesn't print
Me: Do you have a steady green light on the printer ?
User: Yes
Me: Is there any other lights other than the steady green light ?
User: No
Me: When you click the "Print" button does the green light blink on your printer ?
User: Yes but it doesn't print

I decide the problem is worth going at the user's desk, when I get there the first thing I noticed is that her task bar showed there was a windows error window opened but hidden behind her Microsoft Word window.  I click on in on the task bar, read the message, ask the user if she knows what it means what she's done about it.

Her answer: No I don't know what it is, I've been having it all day, I keep closing it but it keeps coming back. Just forget about that and fix my printer would you ?

Guess what the error message was........"Printer Out of paper !"

 :voodoo:

MEJHarrison

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Re: King of Idiots
« Reply #19 on: July 09, 2008, 06:40:08 PM »
Along these same lines, you could spend hours at Computer Stupidities.

I'm also quite fond of Acts of Gord.  It's a little more weird, but if you dig down deep enough, there's some real gold in there. :laugh: