Topic: These stupid things they keep doing that bothers me

[Touti]

There are things that they do in movies or tv series that don't correspond to common knowledge and yet they keep doing it.

A starship explodes in space: You hear an explosion, everydoby knows there can't be sound without air.

Star trek, "The enterprise is adrift", then they show you the ship with its nose down and tilted on the side.  Stupid, it's in the middle of nowhere and there's no horizon in space.

Somebody cries: You see the actress playing a scene where she cries her heart out but there's not tears running on her face, her eyes aren't even wet.  Can't they throw water in her face, drop soap in her eyes or something ?  What's so complicated in showing tears when someone cries.

I'm sure I could think of more.........

And you, is there any recurring hollywood nonsense that bothers you ?

[lyonsden5]

Cell phones that work EVERYWHERE!

Elevators, underground bunkers, the middle of nowhere, etc. Not the cool Satellite phones some movies have, just your basic cell phone.

Heck, I can't get a good signal onmine when I go into the Kitchen! 

[RossRoy]

Why does the machine gun always miss? I love when hundreds of rounds of ammunition miss the target!

To go along with that, there's the magical automatic refilling ammunition clip that never runs out. 


I also love a good detective movie, where the detective tells his partner "the vic died by being shot from 9mm"... fast forward some, then they find the murder "weapon", confirm is the "murder weapon"... but it's a .357 on screen!! 


The whole being projected 25 feet backwards when shot by a shotgun is always nice too, especially when the shooter, that's holding the gun UNDER his shoulder, doesn't have any recoil  (physics 101 guys "action = reaction")

The exploding gas tank from a bullet is also quie laughable http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MythBusters_(season_3)#Car_Capers_-_Exploding_Gas_Tank

[Achim]

I also love a good detective movie, where the detective tells his partner "the vic died by being shot from 9mm"... fast forward some, then they find the murder "weapon", confirm is the "murder weapon"... but it's a .357 on screen!! 

Could the reason for this be, that 1" equals 25.4mm and therefore 0.357" is approx. 9mm?

[SailorRipley]

Any movie starring Jill (Just Insane Leading Lady). Jill is supposed, to be smart, brave. Jill comes down the dark basement. Jill begins crying out: "Hello?? Billy? Is anyone there?? Billy Billy? Is that you, Billy? Billy, Billy, Bill..." WHACK! How come Jill is always so damn stupid is beyond me.


The psychopath/ruthless villain/just damn bad guy with a reason. "Alright, [insert name of standard hero character here], finally I have you right where I wanted. I'm going to throw you down this 48th floor, but first... I'm going to tell you a story of how I was an abused child and I'm on a mission to kill everyone out there 'cause my mom refused to get me a vanilla ice cream when..." It's like, KILL THE FRIGGING GUY ALREADY!


Thunder sounds and lightning always come in pairs. Makes me groan every time. Fortunately there are some movies that are apparently beginning to catch on. From the top of my mind, Attack of the Clones has been one of the first to get it right.


-"Don't die on me, man"
- "I am... so cold... so cold..."


Man walks into a bar.
Bartender: "What can I get you?"
Man: "A beer. Cold."
WHAT BEER???


Menstruation. This is an unknown phenomenon. All females appear to be immune to it.


They just had sex. Yet she feels the need to cover her body once they're awake. Hell, she'll even walk around the house with the sheets.


Computer mouse? We don't need any stinking computer mouse! We have keyboards, you can even set bombs by typing like a lunatic.


No child can ever be killed, no matter how bad the villain wants to.


I don't know about you, but when I have a nightmare, I never stay in bed, kind of open my eyes lazily and think: "that was bad". No, sir. I ALWAYS sit-jump upright with this terrified look on my face.


Unknown fact. Movie characters are born with hi-tech specialty designed tubes comfortably attached on their genitals and ass. Movieland has made restrooms a thing of the past.


No sweating during sex - All women will moan even if the guy sucks in bed.


The noisy camera. Any standard thriller will suddenly have a camera move and will go SWOOOOOOSH!


Villain = Foreigner.

[Touti]

I don't know about you, but when I have a nightmare, I never stay in bed, kind of open my eyes lazily and think: "that was bad". No, sir. I ALWAYS sit-jump upright with this terrified look on my face.

You forgot you've been sweating like hell because this nightmare has lasted forever so you actually sit-jump upright with this terrified look on your face, soaked wet as if you had just run a marathon but since you're a pig and your wife doesn't give a s... how you stink you just go back to sleep without changing your pajamas or at least going to the washroom to cold wash your face.

[Kathy]

This one drives me crazy!

Why, when being chased by some unknown evil, do they always fall down?

[Touti]

And what the about all those guys who get a 400lbs worth kick in the balls but they never have to go to hospital.
Women who fight and don't seem to feel anything when they get a good kick on the boobs.

Cars that seem to have a mind of their own.  At least the James Bond movies pushed it far enough to make it amusing.

Making people use a computer as if they were morons.  I hate the scene in "You've got mail when Tom Hanks repeatedly hits the backspace key to delete an entire sentence, actually gets impatient and goes at it with two fingers to go quicker.  Ever heard of auto-repeat on keyboard ?

People typing on a keyboard with 2 index fingers but they put sounds on it like they're typing 100 words per minute. 

And last but not least..........the famous cigarette thrown in gas that either starts this huge fire or makes the whole city go into a beautiful explosion.  In real life absolutely nothing would happen because it takes a spark or a fire to ignite gasoline.

[Halo2]

Laptop computers that can interface with alien technology and defeat it (think ID4) or the hero just plugs into the evil overloard's network and immediatly has full and unfettered access. I work in IT and when I setup a new user or a user's new computer, if I don't have everything right, I can't get the computer onto the domain.

  

[SailorRipley]

You forgot you've been sweating like hell because this nightmare has lasted forever so you actually sit-jump upright with this terrified look on your face, soaked wet as if you had just run a marathon but since you're a pig and your wife doesn't give a s... how you stink you just go back to sleep without changing your pajamas or at least going to the washroom to cold wash your face.

  So true.

Here are some more:

Films that involve sign language: There's always one character non-deaf mute who conveniently will say out loud the words to the other person, even if he/she can't hear a word the character is saying. (How about some subtitles for that kinda thing?)


If you play a character in a sports movie, you are always equipped with magnifying gamma vision and it's not a problem spotting your loved one, even if you're on a stadium with 500,000 audience members.


If you're in a war movie, you should know that there's always a good chance of surviving, unless you commit the huge stupidity of showing around that picture of your sweetheart back home that you always keep in your pocket.


Movie villains are so bad, they always kill their henchmen when they screw up. Because, you know... they're really bad.


Grocery bags are so technically advanced in Movieland, they weight nothing, even if you buy groceries to last for 2 months.


To this date, no spaceship has successfully developed a technology capable of being silent, even if it's stationed. They are very very noisy.


Movieland has Tivo machines installed in all car radios. Just turn it on and you'll be filled with all the latest shocking news, usually involving you.


If for some reason you're caught and thrown in jail, there's a good chance most inmates will have the utter need to rape you. But fear not, there's always the good, calm, wise old man who has been doing time for about 200 years and is ready to help you out


Movie babies are fed throughout pregnancy with nuclear food, that way, when they're born they will look exactly like a 6 month old.


Birth labor in Movieland will last for about 20 seconds, after that, POP! Kiss the baby.


If you're a movie cop, please remind your captain not to provide you with a partner. No matter what happens, he will die.


Police Captains are always in a very bad mood. Don't mess with them.


If you're playing a Hispanic, even if you have lived all your life in the US, you won't have the slightest idea how to say, "Sir", you will always say "Señor".


Movie villains are extremely sharp shooters, if they shoot the hero, it will always be on the shoulder, they've been trained that way.


Being a Movie Cop usually means you are unable to cope with the opposite sex. It has become synonymous with divorce. You'll probably have a drinking problem as well.


Martial Arts characters live by a code of honor stating that you can outnumber the good guy, but you must give him the chance to fight you all one by one.


If you choose to play a movie villain, you have the chance to at least have two lives. It doesn't matter if you have 350 bullet wounds, you can easily respawn and get up after a few minutes. Saying outloud: "lol, noob" is optional.


Floppy disks are conveniently marked: "Nuclear launch code."


All aliens take crash courses in English.


Asteroids sound just like engines.


All nuclear bomb wires are color coded.


If your character is supposed to go on the backseat of a car, you can only sit right in the middle. Sorry.


If you're chased by a car, you're not allowed to run on the sides, you must always run in front of the camera.


Women can't run by themselves, all men must take their hand.


Movie hackers have simplified the process by typing a highly difficult to learn programming code: "Upload virus".


If someone you love is dying, don't you dare call an ambulance. Instead, hold her/him lovingly in your arms and whisper words of comfort.

[DJ Doena]

Why, when being chased by some unknown evil, do they always fall down?

Should they fall up?

[Najemikon]

Laptop computers that can interface with alien technology and defeat it (think ID4) or the hero just plugs into the evil overloard's network and immediatly has full and unfettered access. I work in IT and when I setup a new user or a user's new computer, if I don't have everything right, I can't get the computer onto the domain.

  

That is the exact post I was going to make! ID4 made me laugh so much. 24 is always funny; I swear there was a line once like "they're attacking the firewall, but don't worry. The Cisco is holding." ... cue screen showing a graphic equaliser going nuts. I want that firewall!  :hysterical:To be fair, at least 24 is supposed to be daft.

My favourite regular computer thing though is the "YOU HAVE MAIL" animation that takes up the ENTIRE SCREEN! Sometimes with a loud "bong!" noise. I get about a million spam messages a day. It would send me nuts.

BTW, I'm getting concerned about my sex life. My lipstick never wears off either ...

[DJ Doena]

To this date, no spaceship has successfully developed a technology capable of being silent, even if it's stationed. They are very very noisy.

This one has: http://www.dvdcollectorsonline.com/index.php/topic,242.msg2971.html#msg2971

[DJ Doena]

Also interesting are the computer where one only has to enter a password and immediatley after presents a search screen where one can find all the information with one ore two keywords.

[Najemikon]

The psychopath/ruthless villain/just damn bad guy with a reason. "Alright, [insert name of standard hero character here], finally I have you right where I wanted. I'm going to throw you down this 48th floor, but first... I'm going to tell you a story of how I was an abused child and I'm on a mission to kill everyone out there 'cause my mom refused to get me a vanilla ice cream when..." It's like, KILL THE FRIGGING GUY ALREADY!

I loved the scene in Austin Powers where Scott Evil is trying to convince his dad to just kill Austin ... "You're not even going to watch?!"